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Flying Lessons: Whispers of Passion

Alright here we go! Diving into Kelly Rae Roberts’ course this week. I’m already about a week behind on the material after coming back from Arizona – but it was fabulous and worth it! More soon on our beautiful and healing trip to Sedona and the Grand Canyon… but for now, on to my first lesson in making my creative dreams soar!

Whispers of passion – no, it’s not the newest series by the author of 50 Shades of Gray… although it sounds like it! These are the quiet voices of our heart and soul pulling at us, guiding us with slow, subtle force. These are the dreams, the places we find ourselves getting lost when we can’t sleep at night, or standing in line at the grocery story, or sitting in our cubicles or while watching TV at night. Our passions speak to us all the time, no matter what we’re doing or where we are, but it can take some pretty intense listening skills to hear it above all the chatter of everyday life.

Starting to hear my passion
I think last year was the first time since I was a little girl that I was starting to be able to hear my passion again. I began to have this yearning to create things – not to sell them or to get recognition or really DO anything with them, but just to make things again like I did as a kid… just because it was FUN! Somewhere along the road of college and jobs and money and life, I lost touch with that childlike part of myself. So for me, 2011 was all about finding it again.

My 12 Months of Creativity project really helped me to do that. Looking back, that project changed everything for me. It gave me a confidence I didn’t even know I was missing. When I started that year, I truly believed I didn’t have good ideas and that I was not really very creative (which is actually insane considering I’ve been doing some kind of art my whole life since I was old enough to hold a crayon). Thru those 12 months, I learned to value my own creativity as something beautiful and uniquely mine, and I fell in love with the joy of making things just because it’s fun!

 The whispers get louder…
Earlier this year it seems like those quiet whispers began to get louder. Gradually, I was finding myself more aware of ideas all around me, to the point that often times I’d be sitting at work just bursting with creative energy and frustrated to not be able to let it out. I started to pick up some freelance clients to do graphic design work for, I stated a local creative community, I took a welding class, I opened an Etsy shop.. I had a voracious appetite for creating things of all sorts! I started daydreaming about building enough freelance clients to be able to leave my full time job. It felt like my creative spirit was getting more and more ready for something big, and I was taking small steps forward, until the universe brought about things that required much bigger steps….

Everything changes…
As many of you know, my world changed entirely on June 12, when my fiance passed away in an accident while working as a helicopter pilot up in Washington state. Devastation is the only word for this.

Although I’ve lost both of my parents, losing Drew has been an infinitely deeper and more traumatic experience… it was the death of my whole future, of our plans, our life, our family. It is the only experience I’ve come against in life that has ever left me fully afraid that I may not survive it. But here I am still.

Something happened in me when I lost him. Something was lost, something else was found, something switched on, other things switched off, but really what it boils down to is that I decided. I decided that “fear” is not a good enough reason anymore. I decided that I’m not playing by the old rules any more… I’m done tip-toeing around afraid to truly commit to myself. I’m someone new, and I’m not settling for anything less than what my heart and soul truly desires. I want to make things every single day that bring myself and others joy. And that’s what I’m going to do!

So here’s where we’re at…
It’s been almost 4 months since the accident now. Now, I am trying every day to follow my heart, not my head. I quit my job and moved out of Dallas down to stay with Drew’s family in South Texas. Do I know where I’m going from here? Nope. Do I have a plan? Not really. My only plan is to make beautiful things. To make something every day that brings joy to myself and others… and let God or the universe or my handsome guardian angel help me figure out the rest along the way. For the first time in my life, I am just trusting that I will be okay.

One thing I’ve learned through all this is that the more I listen to those whispers of my passion, the louder and more beautiful they become. The more I listen to what my heart really wants, the more opportunities come into my life that feed that truth… and the more beauty is brought to me. The challenge is to stay in the present moment – to keep myself out of the future and past and of letting all those fears and what-if’s and have-not’s get to me… and to make sure to sit with those feelings whenever they do need to be heard.

God, I’m really going to have to find a way to make the posts more concise! I cannot very well write a novel like this for every lesson in this course! I’ll try to keep the next one shorter… although it’s all about FEAR, so it’s likely to be a big one as well! ;)

21 Comments Post a comment
  1. Wow, I can’t express how impressed and amazed I am by this post. You are so strong. I’m dealing with my boyfriend heading back to Australia for three months, not gone forever and I find that hard. I’m also on a similar personal creative mission. I’d been fighting those whispers of passion for my entire adult life and career, but last year I quit my job to go travelling, paint and draw more and figure out how I could make a living out of creativity. And it’s happening! Bit by bit. But I have commissions for Christmas when I get back home. You’re an inspiration. Please keep being you and I can’t wait to hear your next post. With love from Lima (today). Caroline x

    Friday, September 28, 2012
    • Thank you such much for your wonderful comment Caroline. I haven’t been to your blog in a while, but I remember your story! It so excited me to hear about your travels! I love your most recent post.. you are a great writer and a strong gal yourself! Traveling alone all over the world? Yep that takes some balls. I may be hitting you up for travel advice one day when I am ready to take off on my own world travel adventures! ;)

      And you know.. any amount of time away from that special someone is scary and un-fun! Drew was only supposed to be gone for a few months, and that idea was hard for us. Though we certainly never expected anything like this to happen… sometimes now I just think to myself “ok he’s just on a WAY longer trip… i just have to be patient for a lifetime – and live the most kick-ass life I can while I’m here – and then when it’s done, we will be reunited and have SO much to talk about.” I know with all my heart I will see him again… sometimes that’s not enough, but sometimes, its just enough to keep me goin!

      Thank you again – will be following along on your adventures! =)

      Saturday, September 29, 2012
      • cazbag #

        You’re an amazing girl – I’ve just read your part 2 post. Wow. I’m sending up prayers for you and wishing you all the best things in the world. Carry on kicking those asses! And yes, come to me for travel advice any time.

        Wednesday, October 10, 2012
  2. This post just did three things to me. Yes three! I was awakened, brought me quick realization that the decisions I’ve made lately is getting me closer to what I want to create in today’s world and lastly it’s brought to an awareness of what we are all created to be. TO CREATE! Sorry about your boyfriend, we are always pulled down by the loss of a loved one but certainly not pulled out. There is always a reconnection. Don’t know what else to say because the words are not coming through. You’ve really blessed my day.

    Friday, September 28, 2012
    • Thank you! I was so hesitant to post this one.. those old voices saying “sucky writing! no one will like this!” – and you definitely helped shut them up! ;) I’m so glad you got something from it, and that you are feeling good about the direction you’re going in! Thankyou for your condolences as well friend!

      Saturday, September 29, 2012
  3. Melinda Cole #

    A beautiful and brave post Sarah. Thanks for sharing such personal things. <3

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  4. I feel very touched reading your post. I am very sorry for your loss. (I’m from Washington state, but living overseas, and I heard about this accident.) Though not through a death, I understand those feelings of loss of a shared future, a shared dream, a family. All of it. It is very painful.

    At the same time I feel so sad for your loss, I equally feel a strong sense of admiration for your bravery to push forward and not settle. To do exactly what it is you want to do. What you feel will make you happy. You clearly have found a lot of strength within you.

    Everything you are putting out there – all that creative energy – is going to come right back to you. 10 fold.

    The phoenix rises from the ashes.

    With love,
    from a sister flyer

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  5. Sarah reading your blog post was fabulous. You are a very brave and courageous women and I thankyou very much for sharing with us all.

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  6. Thank you so much for such an honest and inspiring post. Your brave raw words inspires me to keep going in the direction of my dreams. This post needs no editing, loved every word and felt your passion. bog love dal xxxx

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  7. Your post has touched and inspired me! I am so sorry for your loss! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me to see things clearer and to not be afraid of the truth!
    Hugs Hun!
    A fellow flyer
    Michelle x

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  8. kpottinger #

    Sarah, you are so brave to share this with all of us! I am so sorry that you lost Drew and your future with him – when you have made your life plans around someone else that you love so much then that dream disappears, I can only imagine what it must be like.
    Good for you for quitting your job and leaving Dallas! Being with Drew’s family must be healing for all of you!
    My thoughts and prayers are with you on this new journey of yours :)

    Karen – a fellow flyer

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
  9. Wow. You are amazing. To have been through so much recently and be able to be so clear now is truly remarkable. This is beautifully written. I can’t wait to see where you will go and what you will do. BTW. We may have been in Sedona at the same time. Coincidence? I think not.

    Sunday, September 30, 2012
    • Thank you =) It seems that his loss is what has made things so clear, odd, isnt it? Were you in Sedona over this past weekend, around 22nd? That’s when we were there! It was SUCH an amazing place! I cannot wait to go back =)

      Sunday, September 30, 2012
  10. Claudia #

    Your handsome guardian angel is very proud of your bravery and courage! I am always in awe of your grit!

    Monday, October 1, 2012
  11. Ahh, good. I’m glad I can chalk up all my random zoning out and leaving reality to “listening to whispers of passion.” That is a much more pleasant thought that what my doc says is brain fog from being so sick all the time. I will say this – great hardships in life can turn those whispers into random hobo-like yelling, and that’ll grab your attention much quicker. ;)


    You can’t help but stop paying attention to anything else. Especially work. :P

    To be serious, though, you are amazing. I say that a lot, so it’s all old hat, but just in case you forgot, I really admire you.

    Wednesday, October 3, 2012
    • Haha i just loooove your humor Rachel – it always brightens my day! Forevermore I will see those “whispers” as hobos when they get loud. lol. and i will smile and think of you! hahahaha thank you so much! =)

      Wednesday, October 3, 2012
      • :) I’m glad you liked it, it had the potential to be totally strange and off-putting. I’m very happy to imagine my passions as loud hobos now too. XD lol

        Wednesday, October 3, 2012
  12. I am so sorry for your loss and so inspired by your brave beautiful heart <3

    Sunday, October 21, 2012

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