Today is my 3 year anniversary with WordPress. Crazy. Back in 2010 on this day, I signed up to make a blog. A few months later, in January of 2011, I began this 12 month project – using the blog to hold me accountable. While it has continued to limp along since that first year in a rather haphazard and sporadic fashion, it is 2011 that I am thinking back on today. This project stretched me creativity in ways I could have never imagined that year. It gave me a newfound confidence in my own creative abilities and gave me permission to just DO things because I wanted to – not because they were good ideas or because someone else would like them. Believe it or not, I actually believed before that project that I wasn’t very creative. Ha! I think we can all laugh at the absurdity of that idea now! But that’s where I was. And although when I began this blog and this project I had no intention of changing those beliefs… it was truly the tipping point of turning those negative beliefs around and beginning a journey towards owning myself as a creative individual with a unique voice to share with the world.
Many of you know I was continuing to write about creativity here even after the end of 2011, but was interrupted by life when I lost my fiancé – who was a pilot – in a helicopter crash last June. As my world fell apart, I mostly dropped this blog and went on to create my 2nd blog, Our 1000 Days, to share my story of love and of grief after losing the love of my life. It was where I needed to be. That has turned out to be yet another place that has given me confidence in my creative abilities – again, not ever the intention of writing it. Much like how I felt before beginning this blog, i actually didn’t really think of myself as a particularly good writer and was very self conscious about the fact that I have no formal education in english, poetry, literature, or writing whatsoever. Through writing Our 1000 Days and telling our story and my story, I have gained much healing and also – to my surprise – I have slowly gained confidence in my writing and begun to step more fully into owning that part of myself too. He continues to give me gifts even from the other side.
Now, 3 years later, when people ask me what I do… I confidently say to them “I am an artist”. I don’t dance around it anymore. Even if I’m not making much money with doing it, even though no writing of mine has yet to be published, I no longer equate myself being an artist and writer with whether or not I make money from it. Instead, now, I answer that question by telling them the most IMPORTANT thing I do, the most MEANINGFUL thing in my life… not the thing that makes me the most money. And the most important, meaningful thing I do, is most certainly, creating.
Just three years ago, none of this existed. I worked at a job I wasn’t really happy with and I constantly talked myself out of ideas for projects and never gave myself permission to do any of them. I was in a dull, boring slump. Since Nov 19, 2010, I have done furniture making, jewelry making, short films, poetry, welding, encaustic (wax) painting, clay sculpture, feather painting, found object sculpture, large-scale finger painting, photography, needle felting, toy making, raku, glass etching, poster design, nature sculptures, Ukrainian Easter Egg dying, screen printing… and the list goes on. I had my first booth at an art show earlier this year… a dream I have had since I was a little girl, and I have sold my art to lovely people. And in the next week or two, I’ll even be jumping into mosaics for the first time… with the hope to begin teaching grief workshops with it – yet another totally new and uncharted territory for myself!
ALL of that began right here, in these pages, with you guys reading and supporting me. I guess it just goes to show that no matter where you are, that is a really really great place to begin. Today, is the best day to begin… something, anything, and especially if your only reason for wanting to do it is because you’ve never done it and it sounds fun. I assure you, in having fun with new things, you will learn so many amazing things about yourself that you never knew… yup I said it, just by having fun!
So here’s to three years of blogging… and how it has changed my life, how I see myself and the talents that I have to offer the world. Thanks WordPress! And most of all, thanks to everyone who has been along the journey with me and helped me to grow. It would have been an incredibly lonely journey without you, and one with far less depth.
Now get out there and make something today! Just for fun!